Thursday, April 30, 2009

Pearls Before Swine Flu

This is why mainstream news media sucks. If you look around, you've probably seen people walking around with protective masks over their mouths, keeping their kids home from school, and avoiding public transportation. Why? The dreaded Swine Flu.

If you've watched any news on television over the past few weeks, you've heard about how H1N1 Type A, better known as Swine Flu, has devastated Mexico and is coming for your good, pure American children (if you favor closing the Southern border as a response, by the way, you are a xenophobe and a racist. Just a little reality check for you there).

Here's the problem. While getting Swine Flu is no picnic, the CDC indicates that Swine Flu is about 30,000 times LESS DEADLY than regular ol' seasonal flu that no one seems to feel the need to worry about.

So instead of people being taught by media outlets to take reasonable health precautions at all times, we're taught to remain insulated until the mainstream media tells us to panic (all in the name of the Great God Ratings, of course), at which point everyone dutifully FREAKS OUT.

Here's some news for you. You're not going to get Swine Flu and die, and by the way, you're not going to get killed by a terrorist or have a gay married couple break up you and your wife. Do as the President says and wash your hands regularly and be nice to your neighbor and everything will be fine.
Unless you're a pig, in which case you may be in trouble. Egypt, in reponse to the panic, has set about slaughtering their entire stock of pigs like...well, like pigs.

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