Sunday, December 28, 2008
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Not that there's anything wrong with it, but I think the new American Basketball Association, founded in 2000 and currently consisting of nearly 40 teams playing all over the world, is a closet gay baskteball league. Don't believe me? Let's look at some of the teams in this league:
The Youngstown Swish
The Charlotte Crossovers
The Alaska Dream
The Houston Takers
The South Texas Showboats
The Georgia GWizzlies
The Bahama All-Pro Show
And an honorable mention has to go to the Butte Bandits of the All American Professional Basketball League.
I think it's great that there is a gay professional sports league. As long as none of the players say they are "married to the game," they just might do all right.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Well, well. It seems that my New York Jets have knocked the Tennessee Titans off their undefeated pedestal. Takes a Titan to beat a Titan, I guess. The most surprising thing about the victory is that I'm not surprised. After the Jets returned to their perennial doormat form last year, I expected little from them this year, but since the unfortunate loss to Oakland, they've been playing like a different team. A playoff team, if not necessarily championship caliber yet.
The question is do I now once again have to reevaluate my opinion of Brett Favre? The answer is yes and no. I stand by my disappointment in Favre's earlier performances, but this is a different quarterback we've seen over the last few games. This is a quarterback who uses his running backs, who doesn't panic and doesn't gamble, and hence, doesn't throw interceptions or make big mistakes. This is a quarterback who gives us everything we got Brett Favre for, and not the stuff we would rather do without.
That being said, he couldn't be doing this alone. The Jets line, on both sides of the ball, is the best it has been possibly ever, guided by standouts Alan Faneca on the offensive side of things and Kris Jenkins on defense. Leon Washington has had some tremendous performances both on special teams and behind the line, and Thomas Jones has looked great. So credit where it's due: Favre, keep doing what you're doing, but know you've got a team behind you that's making you look good.
See you in the playoffs.
Monday, November 10, 2008
Here's a report and article about an 8 year old boy who shot his father and a boarder to death in Arizona. According the article: "Romero was from a family of avid hunters and wanted to make sure the boy wasn't afraid of guns and knew how to handle them." Mission accomplished!
Thanks for the liberal gun control laws, Justice Scalia!
Saturday, November 08, 2008
In order to protect traditional marriage, I am proposing Proposition 8A, which will make adultery (but only for cheating women), a capital offense. A vote yes on 8A will reinstate the death penalty in Califoria but only in matters of adultery. When passed, any married woman who fornicates with a man other than her husband, as well as that man, will be summarily executed and marriage will be saved.
Do YOU want ADULTERY taught in our SCHOOLS?
Are our CHILDREN safe from ADULTERERS?
Do you want to be COMPELLED to ACCEPT ADULTERY?
Save the institution of marriage. Vote YES on 8A!!
You hypocritcal bastards.
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Unfortunately, the victory is bittersweet for patriots here in California due to the passage of Proposition 8, an amendment to take rights away from Gay Americans, and the passage of similar laws throughout the country.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
TDs: 15 Int: 11 Yds: 1611 QB Rating: 89.5
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Sunday, September 07, 2008
Friday, September 05, 2008
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Monday, September 01, 2008
Advantages to New Orleans:
Focuses Attention on the Crisis
Allows President Bush to Focus on the Crisis.
That seems to me to be about it. Having John McCain on call during the Gustav emergency does not seem to me to be any more crucial than having any of the other 99 U.S. Senators on call (less crucial than Mary Landrieu and David Vitter). In addition, to be frank, most of the major news outlets had already decided to focus their attentions on Hurricane Gustav, so this move seems almost like a face-saving one.
Advantages to the McCain Campaign:
No Fiddling While Rome Burns
This is one of the ostensible reasons for the move, so that the Republicans don't appear to be partying and celebrating in the midst of a crisis, but frankly I think it's the least of the true reasons. For example, now...
Bush and Cheney Don't Have to Speak at the Convention
Given that the McCain campaign is desperately trying to distance itself from the Bush Administration, this is a huge plus.
Less Attention on Sarah Palin
Given that this woman seems to be little more than bait for women voters, I'm guessing the less she says and the less she is scrutinized, the better.
No Comparisons Between McCain Speech and Obama speech
Clearly McCain did not have a chance to match Obama's speech, both because he is less skilled at oratory and he has less to say. What was he going to proclaim, that that 90% of the time that he voted with Bush was a fluke? That he represents change even though he comes from the same party that has bludgeoned this country for the last eight years? I don't think so.
While I hope New Orleans benefits from this move, it really seems to be another pandering political move, like the selection of Palin, designed to win an election for a party that clearly doesn't have the facts or the issues on its side. Well, who can blame them, it's worked before. Let's hope the American people are too smart for them this time.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Are you freaking kidding me? Its made of GLASS! You cheap bastards!
Saturday, August 23, 2008
One wonders why Democratic candidates don't think of these things when running against each other. This one is really bad and you can be sure we are going to hear about it all day long on FOX news.
Thursday, August 07, 2008
Wednesday, August 06, 2008
In other news, my significant other Elizabeth and I are in the final 25 out of 900 entrants in the FOX New York Television Festival Comedy Script Contest. Stay tuned to this space as details develop!
Sunday, August 03, 2008
So, hits and misses with "The Dark Knight" from a Fanboy's perspective.
The Joker. Didn't expect that, did you? My issue is this. In his first appearance, the Joker used Joker Venom. It poisoned his victims while causing their faces to spasm in a crooked, twisted smile. This made his murders all the more horrible and it was ignored in this film. Maybe Nolan thought corpses with big smiles would look too cartoony but I think it's an important part of the character.
Update: No doubt the football elite have been reading my blog, as Brett Favre has agreed to return to the Packers and the Packers have agreed to give him a shot at the starting job. See? Everybody does the right thing, everybody's happy!
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Listen, Brett Favre seems like a nice guy. But he wasn't too worried about what was fair in 2001 when he signed a $100 MILLION DOLLAR LIFETIME CONTRACT. That is not a misprint. Favre agreed to play out his career in Green Bay, and the Packers agreed to pay him more money than you or I or 90% of those Packer fans that feel so bad for him will probably ever see in a lifetime. Brett, you had a charmed career and are rich beyond belief. Either go out on top or go hold a clipboard for Aaron Rodgers but don't make the Packers the bad guy here. I am generally a labor guy and I am telling you the Brett boosters are wrong on this one.
Just for fun, take this little quiz. Which of the following were actually said by Brett Favre?
A) "I don't want to move. I enjoy the fans. I just want to stay. I couldn't envision myself playing for another team."
B) "If (playing for another team) would ever come up, I'd probably just retire. I've made enough money that I don't need to jump ship and go somewhere else."
C) "I know it shouldn’t feel unsuccessful, but the only way to come back and make that be the right decision would be to come back and win a Super Bowl. And honestly, the odds of that, they’re tough. Those are big shoes for me to fill, and I guess it was a challenge I wasn’t up for."
D) All of the Above
If you said D, you deserve $100 million dollars!
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Ateqeh was hanged to death in the city square and then had her grave defiled. There was a report on it in the Iranian Press Service. As far as I know Wolf Blitzer had no comment.
Sail on, Zac! TEEN POWER!
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Saturday, July 05, 2008
I've taken an early lead as Raymer and Negreanu both made swift exits, but anything can happen. That's poker!
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
You simply put in your address or area of interest and you will get reports of gas prices in your area, color coded to indicate how recently the prices have been updated. It couldn't be easier, and the only way we're going to get these gas prices down is by consistently going to the cheapest pumps, so let's get cracking.
Monday, June 30, 2008
The pabulum spouting mainstream media outlets responded by taking about the "7 words you can't say on television." Oh those 7 words." "Oh George, you and your seven dirty words." "Who can forget those seven dirty words!" Most of these newsreaders on CNN, MSNBC, Fox, etc., have probably never seen a Carlin routine in their lives.
Carlin was about so much more than fighting censorship. Carlin pointed out the absurdity of life with an unbiased eye. Whatever ridiculous platitudes and self-serving cliches you thought you could get away with in real life, Carlin would deconstruct mercilessly, making you laugh all the way. Rest in Peace, George, wherever you are. Here is the master himself giving his thoughts on death and the afterlife. They're not very comforting, but it wouldn't be Carlin if they were. (Note: The explanation of this post's title can also be found within.)
Friday, June 27, 2008
In addition, the game is designed to actually teach you and increase your vocabulary. It's a win win. You get smarter and starving people get to eat. How often do you get a win-win in life?
Thursday, June 26, 2008
It's a big deal because it's the Supreme Court giving a big F-U to the American people. The Court is saying that no matter how many people want a government led according to the principles of the Democratic party, the right wing court will always be there to wield the power. They have five activist judges willing to overstep their bounds and make their own laws and that's what they're going to do.
And make no mistake, that is what they've done here. The text of the Second Amendment is quite clear:
A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.
In any country not full of gun nuts, that would not be open to interpretation (and don't come at me with the commas issue. It says what it says). There's a dependent clause in there. It says because we need a militia (because we have no standing army), everyone needs to be able to have a gun (in case the Redcoats come). The conservatives would have you believe that despite the fact that every other part of the consititution is carefully worded with specific purpose, the Founders just threw in that part about the militia for the hell of it. That it was just a bit of a jerk off. That they got together and said: We think every nut should be entitled to pack heat but instead of writing that, let's mention that a militia is important. It's ridiculous. It's nonsense.
And the Court knows it's ridiculous. They ruled that people were entitled to own a gun subject to certain limitations. Unh uh. That's not what it says either. It says shall not be infringed. No limitations. It was okay that they wrote that because if you only have your gun to fight off invading Redcoats and the occasional Cherokee, there's no reason for limitations. On the other hand, if the national defense issue is off the table and has nothing to do with the right to own a gun, even the Court understood that limitations are needed. So they decided limitations were legal. Even though the constitution says they're not. They simply wrote a law. One that says the opposite of what the constitution actually says.
This is the Bush legacy. Activist judges who control our government like it was Fascist Italy or Communist Russia. Possibly for decades to come. So much for checks and balances. So much for the American experiment.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Here is a picture of a unicorn. This is not a joke and I do not know how to photoshop. This is an actual picture of an actual unicorn discovered in Italy this week. It's not as smooth-looking as the unicorns you see illustrated in storybooks, but reality rarely is. Still. A unicorn.
Monday, June 09, 2008
Unemployment Rate in 2000: 4 percent
Drop in Violent Crime 1992-2000: 506,784
Hostile Action Military Deaths: 76
Federal Surplus: +230 Billion
Cost of a Gallon of Gas: $1.51
By way of comparison, here are some more current numbers:
Unemployment Rate in 2008: 5.5 percent
Drop in Violent Crime 2000-2006: 7,741
Hostile Action Military Deaths: 2,596
Federal Deficit: -410 Billion
Cost of a Gallon of Gas $4.00
But everyone should keep on voting Republican for President and blaming Democrats and see how much better things get.
Sunday, June 01, 2008
We can all see how well the first one worked out.
The Electoral College system is a dinosaur. It was designed for times when there was no direct communication between states, let alone instant communication all over the world. It was for a time when a local man in a small town had to get up in the town square and say "This man Thomas Jefferson is a great man! Vote for me to ride my horse to Philadelphia and represent Smithtown's interest in Thomas Jefferson!"
That man was called a delegate, and he clearly isn't needed any more. It's time for America to have a true democracy where everyone's vote counts. We can rebuild it. We have the technology.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Old Oak Common TMD
Sunday, May 25, 2008
While I love the sentiment, I think the creator got the characters a bit wrong, to wit:
Charlie Brown is definitely Nite-Owl. Nite-Owl is an every man, who does his best despite knowing that most of his efforts are ultimately doomed to failure.
I like Schroeder as Ozymandias. They look sort of similar, and both clearly have some special gifts.
Pig Pen has got to be Rorschach. A traumatic childhood would explain a lot about why PigPen is such a mess.
I think Linus is Dr. Manhattan. Linus is sort of the moral center that the Peanuts world revolves around. Although Manhattan has his own unique morality, both he and Manhattan are Jesus-like figures in their respective universes.
By extension this would make Sally the Silk Spectre, since their relationship is a key element of both universes.
Finally I think Lucy is the Comedian. She sees the world as it is and finds it both wanting and entertaining at once, as she pulls the football away every time.
Monday, May 19, 2008
Craps: Despite the fact that most craps tables have a throng of people crowding to get any piece of the table where they can bet from, and that most of the time the players are betting on someone else's roll, our hero will always be at the head of the table and will always be the shooter for the length of the sequence.
Roulette: Our hero never bets groups of numbers. He only bets a single number or on red or black. He never bets on odd/even. He almost always puts all his chips down on a single spin. This is especially true if he is playing red/black.
Blackjack: All movie and television heroes can count cards. Not only that, but this ability allows them to win instantly and consistently, despite the fact that real card counting may take hours of meticulous concentration before paying off. The hero will usually get escorted or chased away by casino security rather than getting up of his own accord.
Poker: At some point during the sequence, our hero, whether bluffing or holding the nuts, will go all-in for his entire stack. He is also likely to say "I call your (x amount) and raise you (y amount)" even though calling and raising are two separate actions and to try to do both is a clearly illegal string bet.
Slot Machines: Playing slot machines is not heroic. Our hero will play one coin by accident (he happens to have an extra quarter while waiting for a friend, for example). This coin will win him or her a huge jackpot, despite that most slot machines will not pay off a major jackpot unless you play at least five coins. If a secondary character has played a machine for hours to no avail, the very next person who puts a coin in the machine will win a huge jackpot.
Baccarat: Our hero will appear to be a very skilled baccarat player, despite the fact that there is not an iota of skill involved in baccarat.
Sports Betting: Sports betting is for losers. If our hero bets on sports, it's only to show that he has a gambling problem. Anyone else who bets on sports will usually lose, although a final bet may become a miracle win to save the bettor from total disaster, at least temporarily.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Monday, May 05, 2008
There are a ton of reasons why this is a bad idea. One that concerns me the most is the safety of the participants. With millions of dollars on the line, who is to say that some unscrupulous type might not pay someone to make one or more of his opponents "disappear?" It sounds dramatic, but things like this happen in other countries all the time, eliminating the competition, as it were, with a lot less money at stake.
Here are the main reasons why this idea is a disaster and how Harrah's addresses them.
1. Harrah's is getting the "float" from all the entry fee money while waiting for the main event to finish.
Harrahs: The money will be put into an interest-bearing account and the full amount of that account will be distributed to the players when the time comes.
2. The players may have only been able to afford one trip to Vegas this year.
Harrahs: All players will receive ninth place money once the final table is set. In addition, sponsorship deals made in the interim are likely.
3. The players' safety may be at risk.
Harrahs: Each of the players at the final table will be followed closely by television cameras and documentarians up until the final. This close scrutiny should protect them from harm.
4. The players may collude.
Harrahs: See above. Also, Harrah's will take every anti-collusion step they deem possible and effective.
5. A player may die in the intervening months.
Harrahs: A player could just as easily die in the day between the final table being set and the final table commencing under the current format.
I still don't like it, but the chances of my being at the final table of the WSOP this year are negligible, so I guess I'll just sit back and see what happens.